אין עוד מלבד דו There is no one but him
We hear this phrase so many times and in so many contexts, that we are often unable to appreciate the true essence of its beauty. A beauty that only became accessible through the ugliness of the circumstances of my life. No wonder they say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. And stronger I was forced to be.
A few years after their lovely wedding my parents started to get into disagreements. Little arguments turned into wars. Other family members got involved and their perfect marriage started to decay. They were no longer able to look at each other. Divorce was the only option. I was the child of a bitter divorce battle which left everyone divided, forced to pick a side. I was stuck in the middle. I felt tugged in multiple directions without having anything to anchor down to.
Although my parents both hated each other they both loved me. On October, 28th, 2007 my life took a radical turn.
It was a typical Sunday morning at a playground filled with children’s laughter and play where I was ready to join the fun. My parents had planned a visit for that morning. I hugged my mom and dad excited to stand as a happy family for what I know now was the last time. A few moments later my father was shot in front of my eyes. And my mom was removed from my life. I was a four-year-old girl terrified, wanting to go back to a few moments ago when my life felt complete.
I remember waking up the next morning in a police station realizing that my parents would never again be there for me. From that moment on, I would have to fend for myself. In some ways, I have felt like a bag of laundry being dropped off at random laundromats around New York City: I didn’t have a home; I had houses. I didn’t have parents; I had guardians. Although I had everything, it felt as though I had nothing at all.
Despite having support coming from court-ordered therapy, multiple healthy friendships, and loving interactions with my family members, the sense of abandonment persisted to overpower me. But it was in this loneliness where I found the comfort of Hashem.
Many people have asked me how I survived, and even more so thrived after going through this darkness. And my answer has always remained the same: You are never alone because Hashem is with you. גם כי אלך בגיא צלמוות לא אירא רע כי את העם עדי
“Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me”(Psalm 23:4).
Each one of us has lived and survived challenges, heartbreak, and despair which has left us feeling broken. At Bat Melech, we recognize that each woman’s journey is unique. We are here to create a safe space where women and teens can openly share their stories free from judgment. We offer a variety of services ranging from support groups to pregnancy and postpartum classes, mother-daughter events, and so much more.
For me, Bat Melech is an expression of profound gratitude to Hashem. In the power of faith, we discover that Hashem holds us close. Reminding us that every trial has a purpose, every sorrow is met with a beacon of hope, and only in darkness can we truly see the light. I am honored and humbled to bring the vision of Bat Melech to life.